I try to always be my friends' biggest cheerleaders because I've been – and currently am – on the other side. Sending this to a handful of my creator friends, Chris! Thank you, as always.
This is such a great post, thank you for sharing and being so open. In a similar vein I would love to hear your experience and perspective on the following, perhaps a topic for a future submission - I can often struggle with the feeling of being unworthy of what I have. I had a period of my life of being very lost as a late teen, early twenties - I call these the ‘Lost Boy’ years - so millennial I know 😂 Due to some misplaced anger and built up insecurities from high school etc, I acted in ways that are very far away from the person that I am now and that I worked hard to become.
Through hard work and consistency I have been fortunate to create a great life for myself and my family, award winning business etc etc - the issue is that I often get caught in guilt, in that I don’t deserve any of it due to a few handfuls of moments from over a decade ago - things that I have also worked hard to balance and retrospectively put positive energy where negative energy once occurred - over trivial things really - but yet the guilt remains - have you experienced anything similar? Would love to hear your view.
I feel like I need to give this to every comedian I know and work with, and then print it out twice more for myself. (That being said, I've started telling the creatives in my circle about this site.) For the most part nowadays, "bringer shows" seem to be the only way for comedians to develop any traction towards a career in comedy. These shows require the performers themselves to market and "convince" a number of friends (sometimes up to 10 people) to come to their show just to perform. And if you're under the number, you can't go up on stage. So instead of working on your craft, writing and delivery, you have to do the promotors job of putting butts in seats yourself just to get 5 minutes of stage time. And a night out at a comedy club is not cheap, so it can be exhausting and sometimes embarrassing asking the same people to come see you consistently just to try to sharpen the skills. And for the most part, anyone starting out in comedy for better or worse, are in fact worse, myself included when I started. Club owners want you to perform if you already have a following, but how can I build a following unless I perform.
It got to the point where it inspired me to produce my own little show, but with the same issue of putting butts in seats. Only now it's on my terms. I tell my comics to market the show best to their ability, but not contingent for them to perform. I can't police that as an artist myself, already understanding how difficult it is. What's even more frustrating, is when you know those same friends will pay top dollar for a headlining comedian performing on a weekday, but will make excuses as to why they can't come to your show on a Saturday for a 20 dollar ticket. By no means am I saying I deserve a Netflix special, but the slight feels the same.
As you said though, it helps to keep perspective and to be grateful for those who do show up and are present for you. Simply put, you made it click asserting "your friends are not your fans," and perhaps with that understanding, it's not so much that the reception isn't going out clearly, but rather I'm on the wrong channel.
Thanks, Michael. I really appreciate the kind words. And please don't apologize! I have almost no familiarity with that world, so it's really interesting to hear about. And frustrating. And perhaps not so surprising. It reminds me of some of the less than reputable venues my band was forced to play at when were just starting out. God, I haven't thought about that in ages... all the underhanded and creative ways they'd dress up a pay-to-play arrangement to make us feel like they were doing us a favor. And before we'd built up a following, there was no choice. But anyways, kudos to you for stepping up and being that alternative for others. That's incredible.
I heard a podcast a couple days ago about success. Essentially, success in your audience can be enough. If someone is showing up, awesome. I more and more feel not trying is the greater liability. Great topic, Chris!
I promised myself I wouldn’t cry while reading this entry knowing how sensitive I am about this subject.
I failed.
But, this was important information that needed to be shared. Thank you for always providing heartfelt and honest messages to artists who need it, Chris.
This is so relatable. I often notice this trend too with certain friends. I often have to remind myself that most of my friends are not artists and likely have no idea how important a little support can feel.
I try to always be my friends' biggest cheerleaders because I've been – and currently am – on the other side. Sending this to a handful of my creator friends, Chris! Thank you, as always.
Thank YOU! I really appreciate that.
I love the advice of giving out what you would like to receive! Putting that on repeat in my brain ❤️
This is such a great post, thank you for sharing and being so open. In a similar vein I would love to hear your experience and perspective on the following, perhaps a topic for a future submission - I can often struggle with the feeling of being unworthy of what I have. I had a period of my life of being very lost as a late teen, early twenties - I call these the ‘Lost Boy’ years - so millennial I know 😂 Due to some misplaced anger and built up insecurities from high school etc, I acted in ways that are very far away from the person that I am now and that I worked hard to become.
Through hard work and consistency I have been fortunate to create a great life for myself and my family, award winning business etc etc - the issue is that I often get caught in guilt, in that I don’t deserve any of it due to a few handfuls of moments from over a decade ago - things that I have also worked hard to balance and retrospectively put positive energy where negative energy once occurred - over trivial things really - but yet the guilt remains - have you experienced anything similar? Would love to hear your view.
This is a great suggestion. Thanks, Simon.
F*** this was good Chris.
I feel like I need to give this to every comedian I know and work with, and then print it out twice more for myself. (That being said, I've started telling the creatives in my circle about this site.) For the most part nowadays, "bringer shows" seem to be the only way for comedians to develop any traction towards a career in comedy. These shows require the performers themselves to market and "convince" a number of friends (sometimes up to 10 people) to come to their show just to perform. And if you're under the number, you can't go up on stage. So instead of working on your craft, writing and delivery, you have to do the promotors job of putting butts in seats yourself just to get 5 minutes of stage time. And a night out at a comedy club is not cheap, so it can be exhausting and sometimes embarrassing asking the same people to come see you consistently just to try to sharpen the skills. And for the most part, anyone starting out in comedy for better or worse, are in fact worse, myself included when I started. Club owners want you to perform if you already have a following, but how can I build a following unless I perform.
It got to the point where it inspired me to produce my own little show, but with the same issue of putting butts in seats. Only now it's on my terms. I tell my comics to market the show best to their ability, but not contingent for them to perform. I can't police that as an artist myself, already understanding how difficult it is. What's even more frustrating, is when you know those same friends will pay top dollar for a headlining comedian performing on a weekday, but will make excuses as to why they can't come to your show on a Saturday for a 20 dollar ticket. By no means am I saying I deserve a Netflix special, but the slight feels the same.
As you said though, it helps to keep perspective and to be grateful for those who do show up and are present for you. Simply put, you made it click asserting "your friends are not your fans," and perhaps with that understanding, it's not so much that the reception isn't going out clearly, but rather I'm on the wrong channel.
Damn this was long. I'm so sorry.
Thanks, Michael. I really appreciate the kind words. And please don't apologize! I have almost no familiarity with that world, so it's really interesting to hear about. And frustrating. And perhaps not so surprising. It reminds me of some of the less than reputable venues my band was forced to play at when were just starting out. God, I haven't thought about that in ages... all the underhanded and creative ways they'd dress up a pay-to-play arrangement to make us feel like they were doing us a favor. And before we'd built up a following, there was no choice. But anyways, kudos to you for stepping up and being that alternative for others. That's incredible.
I heard a podcast a couple days ago about success. Essentially, success in your audience can be enough. If someone is showing up, awesome. I more and more feel not trying is the greater liability. Great topic, Chris!
I promised myself I wouldn’t cry while reading this entry knowing how sensitive I am about this subject.
I failed.
But, this was important information that needed to be shared. Thank you for always providing heartfelt and honest messages to artists who need it, Chris.
This is so relatable. I often notice this trend too with certain friends. I often have to remind myself that most of my friends are not artists and likely have no idea how important a little support can feel.