The Boy With Super Powers

A True Story

I want to tell you a true story about a young boy who discovered he had super powers.

It all started in a second grade classroom at Ranch View Elementary School. It was the Friday before spring vacation and I was daydreaming about how I was going to spend that week off…

Bike rides to White Hen Pantry to stock up on candy and comic books. Afternoons at my friend Mike’s house where we’d take turns playing his brand new copy of Super Mario Bros 3. Maybe even a trip to the movie theater to see that live-action Ninja Turtles movie that was on the horizon. It was all just minutes away!

And then my teacher gave us a homework assignment.

Shoulders slumped. Eyes rolled. There were audible groans. And I sat there wondering why someone who clearly hated children had decided to become an elementary school teacher.

The terms of our undeserved punishment were as follows: we each had one week to write and illustrate our own short story.

No specific subject. No theme. No guidelines. The only stipulation was that it had to be at least five pages. I think it was the simplicity of those parameters that made it feel so daunting.

I spent the first day or two of that break ignoring the task at hand and defiantly doing all of the fun stuff I’d originally planned on. But I was so frustrated to discover that I wasn't really enjoying any of it. Not with this assignment hanging over my head.

So I grabbed a pen, sat down on my bedroom floor, opened up a spiral notebook...

…and just stared at that blank page.

The minutes passed as I waited for inspiration to strike…

And waited…

And waited.

My muse must have hit traffic on the way over. So I got up and decided I'd try again later. And that same process repeated itself. Over and over and over again. The minutes turned into hours. Hours into days. And that page stayed blank.

At a certain point, I started looking around my room at all the things I'd rather be doing. That stack of comic books... those Ninja Turtle action figures...

But since I'd already learned how futile it was to try and distract myself with those, I decided to approach my problem from a different perspective. What if there was a way to combine work with play?

I started flipping through some Superman comics. I thought about how fun it would be to draw a character with a cool costume that could fly and shoot lasers out of his eyes. Then, as I moved on to an issue of Spider-Man, I realized my favorite thing about Peter Parker was that he had just been a normal teenager before developing his abilities. They weren't just a gift, they were also a curse.

So what would happen if I merged these two characters? A young kid who suddenly develops super strength and the power of flight!

Oh. And laser eyes. Gotta have the laser eyes. Otherwise, what are we even doing here?

And like Peter Parker, he’d have to decide how to use these powers and balance that responsibility with just wanting to be a regular kid.

I even managed to throw in a nod to my beloved Ninja Turtles as well. Because instead of a radioactive spider, it would be a canister of experimental mutagen that transformed my hero.

And yeah, I know. Not only is none of this very original... it's not very good. But I was nine. I was still learning to ride that fine line between homage and outright theft.

I did add a rat tail to my character for some reason though. Was that supposed to be the opposite of Superman’s spit curl? I have no idea.

But listen, that’s not the point. The important part here is that when I went back to that notebook and started scribbling down this initial surge of ideas, it was the first time homework didn't feel like work.

Figuring out the additional details of the story... designing the costume... coming up with a supporting cast of characters... I loved every aspect of it.

And the more I worked on it, the more consumed by it I became. It was all I wanted to do for the rest of that vacation. It didn't even feel like a choice. The idea of just reading stories about superheroes paled in comparison to creating one of my own.

So I returned to school a week later with my opus - The Boy With Super Powers.

At 11 pages, it was the longest story I had ever written. Okay, okay… they weren't full pages (I had to leave some space for the illustrations), but still - it represented more effort than I'd ever put into any school project up to that point.

A lot of my classmates were complaining about what a drag this had been, but I felt invigorated. I wasn't even thinking about a letter grade. I had just enjoyed the process.

When we did receive our grades, however, most of them also came with a few lines of feedback. I had received an A- on mine (which was awesome and maybe even earned me a trip to the video store), but that wasn't even the part I was focused on. It was what my teacher had written below that. One sentence. It said:

"I think writing is your super power."

Then again, it was an A minus. So I think maybe the implication there was that drawing… was not.

But let's focus on the encouraging part. This was a really impactful moment for me. Not just because of her kind words, but because of what this assignment had helped unlock for me and what I'd learned about myself. It was the recognition of the sense of purpose and fulfillment that I felt when I was creating.

So I kept writing short stories. That evolved into making my own comic books. I also started recording fake radio shows and audio serials. From there, I began writing scripts and then going off with my friends to film them. I eventually branched out into music and painting as well. But at the core of all of these explorations was the same idea: I loved telling stories. I loved creating.

It turns out my teacher was right. In terms of how it made me feel, writing did seem like a super power. Or at least one facet of it. Because I'd even take it a step further.

Creativity is my super power.

And when I'm not being creative, I truly do not feel like myself. I become detached. From everyone and everything.

The first time I was made aware of this was when I was around 12 or 13-years-old. That's when these occurrences that would later be diagnosed as depression and anxiety began steadily creeping into my life.

And that’s really how it felt. Like there was this shadow lurking behind me, gradually getting closer and closer. It would whisper terrible things about the kind of person I was. It mocked my ambitions. And persuaded me to recognize how pointless and hopeless everything had become.

That voice grew louder. Eventually, it was indistinguishable from my own thoughts. And that shadow was no longer just stalking me, it was a part of me. We were intertwined to such a degree that I could no longer tell where I ended and it began.

And one by one, I stopped engaging with the things I loved. It was as if the full spectrum of colors my life had been was gradually becoming more and more de-saturated. Until everything just felt... gray.

I wasn't sad. I wasn't angry. I wasn't anything. I felt... nothing.

Now, I don't want to understate just how serious these disorders can be or diminish the importance of the multi-tiered approach I had to take to effectively manage them. I've seen doctors. I've talked to therapists. I've been on various medications.

And one of the most important things I've learned along the way is that two of the most powerful weapons I have against all of this... well, they're two words I mentioned earlier: purpose and fulfillment.

And fortunately, when those are missing, I know where to start looking for them. I start creating. When everything's gray, that's how I get some of the color back.

I use my super power.

One of the most challenging aspects of this has been accepting that it isn't something I conquer and then I'm all better from that point on. This isn't a war that can be won. It's an ongoing battle. This is still, and always will be, a part of me.

Things hardly ever turn entirely gray for me anymore, but if I'm being honest they're also rarely that full spectrum of colors. I'm constantly sliding between the two points.

Which is one of the reasons I decided to start all of this. The original impetus was pretty simple: shit’s bleak and I just wanted to try and put some good out into the world. Maybe you can benefit from some of the insights I’ve gathered over the years and avoid some of the missteps I’ve made along the way.

But I also want to hold myself accountable for staying engaged with my own creative pursuits. So believe me when I say that this is as much for me as it is for you. Because listen, I'm no guru. There’s no pedestal here. I'm on this journey too. And when I’m not creating… when I feel like I’ve lost my super power… the stakes become very real for me.

Maybe you can identify with a lot of what I'm saying. Maybe your demons look and feel a lot like mine. Or maybe yours manifest as something completely different…

Procrastination, time management, self-doubt, a busy work schedule, etc.

That’s okay! Well… I mean, it’s not okay and we’re definitely going to address whatever your obstacles are, but the point is this newsletter is for anyone who wants to be more creative.

Here’s something I’ll bet we definitely have in common though: that collection of creative goals or projects that we've mentally filed away into that "someday" folder. The one that contains all those things you swear you're going to do once you have more time/resources/whatever.

It’s shameful how jam-packed I’ve let mine become. In fact, a single folder wouldn’t even be up to the task anymore. That part of my brain feels more like the hangar at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark.

“I’ll just put this over here with all of my other screenplay ideas…”

In fact, this newsletter… what you're reading right now... THIS was one of those projects for a looooong time.

And there are others. Some half-finished, but most never even started. And you know what? I think it's time to open that folder up and start dusting them off.

I’d like to invite you to do the same. I know what a powerful and transformative force for good creativity has been for me. And I want you to experience that too. Whether you're getting back in touch with it after a prolonged absence, trying something for the first time, or even if it's already a regular practice and you just want to take it to the next level.

That's what we're going to do.

And I really want this to be a two-way street where we’re learning and growing together. You’re going to help guide the direction all of this takes.

Do me a favor. Identify one or two of those “someday” projects you’ve filed away. The ones you’d really love to follow through on.

Then, think about what’s holding you back or standing in your way. What shape do your demons take?

And finally, I want you to take a breath. Because starting now, this isn’t something you have to do alone.

My name's Chris. Let's fight some demons.